Being in the Now VIII

It's been years since I've written an "in the now" post. I've been through some weirdness and changed a lot of gears since then. I've slipped out of the routine of making sure I'm not lamenting the past or longing for or dreading the future. I'll just stop right here and report on the now...

Right now...

My 14 year old daughter is napping beside me, exhausted from being a 14 year old

My bedroom is still in "recovery mode" with the tv positioned on a sofa table at the foot of my bed, complete with 2 seasons of GOT and a myriad of xbox games (the only one that matters is Halo Reach)

My Buddhist prayer flags drape in 10 foot lengths from my light fixture to all corners of my room and sway softly in the breeze from my ceiling fan (Amazing what you can get on Amazon)

All three dogs are snoring, one at my feet, one to my left and one to my right

A yellow plastic basket sits on my side table as a reminder of how thoughtful friends can be and that I really can not only survive but totally enjoy a weekend at a cabin by a creek with no wifi, cell service, data or computer as long as my best friends are there to make me laugh until I'm crippled.

Right now everything is quiet, everyone is napping, the house is full, and still at the same time...an oxymoron.

I'm still in my pajamas and have no intention of messing that up

Counting today as a recovery day, I have accomplished nothing else but sitting here in the bed and I'm ok with that

There are wet clothes in the washer and I don't care

There are dog bed covers in the dryer and I don't care

The sun is beaming through a stunning purple and gold Star Trek stained glass window made by a very special person and infused with love an life (Thank you Jayne Russell!)

A huge peace lily is resting on the bench under my window, a reminder that I am so fortunate to have a great job and people there who want me to have living gifts that keep on giving

Right now, I'm trying to like my hair cut which my son said made me look like "a common house mom" whatever that means (I guess because its normal, which is not my usual MO)

I have a 2 inch strip of flesh all the way across my belly that still has no feeling whatsoever and I'm ok with that too

I'm happy. I rode the wave of post surgery psychosis and lived to tell about it!

Right now, the only thing that matters is that we are all safe, we are all healthy and we all have a place in the world and people that love us. I'm surrounded by the evidence of those people and I feel very special and fortunate that I was never alone through my recovery. 

Right now, I'm going to put on some music, cook chicken and dressing and sautee'd squash and enjoy my quiet "common mom" afternoon!